Marriage
Part 2 The Rite of Marriage
Chapter 29 Preparing the Wedding Liturgy
This chapter consists of several examples of
"handouts" that pastors can give a couple preparing for marriage to
help them plan their wedding liturgy. If you know of other good examples of this type of literature and would like to
recommend it to my students and others, please send it to me at webmaster2@tomrichstatter.org.
Have you ever helped a couple plan their wedding liturgy?
What are the most important things to decide? What are the things that the
couple are most concerned about? How can you help them come to make good
liturgical choices? TIME magazine reported on June 2, 2008 that the average cost
of an American wedding is $28,732.
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Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M., Before You Say 'I Do': Four Things to
Remember When Planning Your Wedding Liturgy. Cincinnati: St. Anthony
Messenger Press, 1989. ISBN 0-86716-130-2. $1.95.
Paul Turner, ML Answers the 101 Most-Asked Questions:
The Catholic Wedding Answer Book. Resource Publications, Inc., 2001.
ISBN 0-8930-517-8.
Joseph M. Champlin. Together for Life. Ave Maria
Press, Notre Dame, IN. 1988
German Martinez. Wedding to Marriage. Pastoral
Press. 2003. The author explores what it means for a marriage to be "Christian."
Drawing upon history, human experience, Scripture and the tradition of the
church, he provides a challenging synthesis of the theology and spirituality of
marriage. Includes a study of the revised wedding rite. For
homilists, marriage preparation programs and parish staff. ISBN
1-56929-009-1
I highly recommend giving the couple a copy of
the Catholic Update Video: Planning
Your Wedding Liturgy Catholic
Update Video, St. Anthony Messenger Press, January 2000. V2080.
Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M. "A New Life Project: Marriage" in The Sacraments: How Catholics Pray. Cincinnati:
St. Anthony Messenger Press, June, 1995. Available from
Amazon.com
Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M. "Sacrament of Marriage: Sign of Faithful
Love," Catholic Update, Cincinnati: St. Anthony Messenger Press,
May, 1996. C0596.
Text available at:
http://www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/ac0596.asp
Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M. Chapter 13: "The Sacrament of
Matrimony," in Liturgy and Worship: Faith and Witness, A
Course on Catholic Living. New York: William H. Sadlier, Inc, 1997.
Available from
Amazon.com
Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M. "Whose Wedding Is It, Anyway?" Catholic
Digest, Vol 65 No 8 (June 2001) pp 92-95. (Spanish) "¿Quiénes
se casan??" Catholic Digest en EspaZol,
número especial February 2003. pp 27-30.
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[The following is the text of a little booklet
published by Saint Anthony Messenger Press in 1989 Before You Say 'I
Do': Four Things to Remember When Planning Your Wedding Liturgy but now is out of
print. I tried to incorporate this material into the teaching section of
the Catholic Update Video: Planning
Your Wedding Liturgy]
Four Things To Remember When Planning Your Wedding Liturgy
Your wedding may well be the most important 60 minutes in
your life! You want happy memories of this hour. You want the wedding liturgy to
the be the high point of your wedding day. In order for that to happen, you will
have to plan the hour very carefully -- as carefully (or more carefully) as you
plan where to hold the reception hall, which band to play, which photographer to
employ.
The reception, the band, the photographer, the dress -- these
all cost a lot more than the wedding ceremony, and it may seem natural to give
your time and attention to the items which cost the most. It's the American way.
But it has been my consistent experience that couples who spend time and effort planning
the wedding ceremony -- the "in church" part of the day -- find that
their time and effort were well spent.
You will only have to plan a wedding once in your life. I
have been to hundreds of wedding and have helped countless couples plan this
important moment in their lives; I have talked with many couples after their
wedding and they have told me what they liked, what they wished they had done
differently, what was meaningful, and what was not. In these few pages, I would
like to share with you four insights I have received from these couples which
you can use as the four foundation stones (or basic principles) upon which you
can build a beautiful, prayerful, and personal wedding ceremony.
Start now to think and plan. Read these pages carefully and
get the basic insights in place. These four basic principles are the foundation
stones for planning your ceremony. The foundation stones are usually not the
showiest part of a building, nor the most noticed or talked about, but without a
firm foundation a building will fall. The taller the building, the more
important the foundation; the bigger the wedding, the more important the basic
principles which guide your planning.
In constructing a building, the foundation is laid first. In
planning a wedding ceremony, you should have the basic insights well in place
before adding too many details and specifics. The temptation is to start with
the details: Grandmother will present a rose; George will recite the meditation
poem. These details will take on an even deeper meaning and beauty when they are
integrated into an over all plan based on a sound foundation.
You have both been to weddings and already have ideas of what
you want your wedding to look like. It may happen that some of the details you
have been dreaming of for years (or some of the details your mother has been
planning for years) do not fit on the foundation described here. It may happen
that some details will have to be rethought or even abandoned. That is why it is
good to START NOW to lay a foundation that will support a beautiful, prayerful,
integral ceremony.
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SUMMARY OF THE FOUR FOUNDATION STONES OF WEDDING PLANNING
DOING / WATCHING -- PRINCIPLE #1: YOU DO THE MARRYING
The bride and groom do the wedding. The Maid of Honor and
Best Man, the priest, attendants, witnesses, congregation, witness what
the bride and groom do.
AND SO: you will want to plan the ceremony so that it is
evident that you, the bride and groom, are the active agents and not merely
passive spectators to something that the priest is doing for or to you. You will
want to plan so that the agents look active and the witnesses look like
witnesses. For further thoughts about DOING / WATCHING turn to PRINCIPLE
ONE below.
SYMBOL -- PRINCIPLE #2: YOUR WEDDING IS A SYMBOLIC ACTION
Your wedding is a public, symbolic action. All symbols convey
meaning; your wedding "speaks" to your guests. On your wedding day, in
this public action, you want to say something to each other, and to your
friends, and to the Church, and to God.
AND SO: What is it you want to say? What does your marriage
mean? Why are you getting married? Why are you getting married in Church? What
symbols say this meaning? For further thoughts about SYMBOL turn to
PRINCIPLE TWO below.
PRAYER -- PRINCIPLE #3: THE HEART OF THE CEREMONY IS PRAYER
Your wedding day has many parts and components: The rehearsal
dinner, the reception, the photography session, the receiving line, the first
dance and many other components, -- and the hour in church. The time in church
has a different focus than the other components. At the dinner, you want the
guests to enjoy their food; at the photography session, you want everyone to
smile at the camera; at the dance you want everyone to enjoy the music and the
company; in church you want everyone to PRAY.
AND SO: What can you do to make PRAYER the focus of the
ceremony? For further thoughts about PRAYER turn to PRINCIPLE THREE below.
LITURGY -- PRINCIPLE #4: A CATHOLIC CEREMONY IS A LITURGICAL
EVENT
A catholic wedding is a LITURGICAL ceremony. Those things
which make a good liturgy are the same elements which make a good wedding.
AND SO: Think of a time when you really enjoyed going to
church, a time when you really prayed, when you really felt close to God. How
can you plan your wedding so that it will have this same effect on your
guests? For further thoughts about LITURGY turn to PRINCIPLE FOUR below.
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PRINCIPLE #1: DOING / WATCHING -- YOU DO THE MARRYING
The bride and groom do the wedding. The Maid of Honor and
Best Man, the priest, attendants, witnesses, congregation, witness what
the bride and groom do.
AND SO: you will want to plan the ceremony so that it is
evident that you, the bride and groom are the active agents, and not passive
spectators to something that the priest is doing for you or to you. You will
want to plan so that the agents look active and the witnesses look like
witnesses.
VOWS: Traditionally the bride and groom have had very little
to say during the wedding -- often merely an "I do". Today, most
couples choose to say the entire text of their vows to one another rather than
merely saying "I do." Many couples choose to memorize the vows; others
choose to read them from a card or from the book held by the priest. The bride
and groom speak into the microphone so that this central part of the ceremony
can be heard by all their guests.
POSITION: Most couple choose to say their wedding vows
standing in front of the altar and facing the congregation. The priest, bride's
maid and best man stand at the head of the congregation facing the couple and
are the first of the witnessing congregation.
DRESS: A wedding which clearly says that the bride and groom
are active participants in the ceremony requires clothing which permits activity
and participation. I have seen bridal gowns on television that are truly
beautiful to look at but so restrict the bride's movement that she is reduced to
an object to be looked at: her movement is so restricted that any active
participation in the wedding (other than walking in and walking out) is made
impossible by the dress! The clothing you choose for this special day should be
truly "special" -- but it should help your wedding, not hinder it.
Television is something we watch; a television wedding is something we watch. A
catholic wedding is not television -- Church is a participation event.
AT YOUR WEDDING WILL IT BE OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE THAT THE BRIDE
AND GROOM ARE ACTIVE PARTICIPANTS IN THE CEREMONY AND NOT MERELY PASSIVE
SPECTATORS?
SCARED? There is no reason to be scared or nervous or to say
"I couldn't do that". The priest is there to make sure that everything
goes smoothly; it is not his "first time"; he is an old hand at this
and won't let anything go wrong.
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PRINCIPLE #2: SYMBOL – A WEDDING IS A SYMBOLIC ACTION
Your wedding is a public, symbolic action. All symbols convey
meaning; your wedding "speaks" to your guests. On your wedding day, in
this public action, you want to say something to each other, and to your
friends, and to the Church, and to God.
AND SO: What is it you want to say? What does your marriage
mean? Why are you getting married? Why are you getting married in Church?
CHOOSING TEXTS: The most obvious way you tell your guests
what your wedding means is by the words that are used during the ceremony: the
readings, the prayers, the homily, the petitions, etc.
Talk about the meaning of your marriage. Together can you
agree on a sentence or phrase that can focus what you want your wedding to say?
For example: "We want our love to be as firm and lasting as God's love for
us." "We two are now one." "This is a new creation." Of
course, no phrase or sentence can say totally what your wedding means. That is
why the ceremony is a symbolic event. Often a symbol can say more than words. A
hug or a kiss can say more than words alone.
The ritual for marriage offers you many choices for the
readings from scripture and the prayers of the ceremony. Your priest or parish
will supply you with a booklet listing the various readings and texts. A careful
selection of these texts will make the wedding personal: your wedding. You can
leave these choices to the priest -- but then you will most probably get the
priest's "generic wedding," especially if the priest does not know you
personally. Generic products are often cheaper and sometimes just as good. But
the weddings that I have witnessed where the couple have been most satisfied
with the ceremony have been those at which they discussed with the minister or
priest what they want their wedding to mean.
HOMILY: It is important to let the priest know where you are
in your faith journey. What does your wedding say about your faith? What does it
say about the way you experience God and the Church? Why did you pick these
readings rather than other passages from the bible? This information will enable
the priest to prepare a homily for your wedding which you and your guests will
recognize as yours -- and not just "Generic Wedding Sermon Number
Three".
SYMBOLS: Symbols express the meaning of your marriage: the
round ring speaks of the endlessness of love, the wearing of the ring is a
symbol of fidelity. Exchanging the sign of peace with your "new
parents" is expressive of the joining of new family relationships. Ethnic,
traditional symbols can be very expressive: The handing over of a piece of
silver can express "all that I possess I give to you"; the couple
might be bound together physically with a rope or a rosary as they are bound
together in love. Some couples today find meaning in a unity candle.
UNITY CANDLE: Three candles are placed in a stand near the
altar. At the beginning of the wedding, the parents (or family) of the bride and
groom light the two outside candles. After saying their wedding vows the bride
and groom each light a taper from the candle lit by their family, and together
they light the central candle: a new family is born; two become one. Some
couples then extinguish the two original candles to show that they have left
father and mother to cling to one another; but most couples find it more
expressive to let all three candles burning; love is increased, not diminished;
there are now three families; the life of the parent family burns on.
ENTRANCE PROCESSION: There was a time when the bride's father
(owner) brought (dragged) the bride before the magistrate and there exchanged
here for a sum of money (dowry) paid by the groom. When the father no longer
sold the girl, he "gave her away." Many couples today find this symbol
works against the meaning of their wedding ceremony. They want their ceremony to
speak of families, couples, mutuality. The attendants enter together as couples;
the groom enters with his father and mother; the bride then enters with her
mother and father. At the front of the church they symbolically take leave of
their parents and come together and speak a word of welcome to the assembly and
invite them to pray God to bless their vows.
MARRIAGE DURING MASS OR WITHOUT MASS: For some Catholics, the
ultimate sign of God's faithful love is found in the eucharist. The eucharist
can provide a context which amplifies and enforces sacrament of their marriage.
In other cases, particularly where the newly married couple would not be able to
break bread together (would not both want to, or be able to receive Holy
Communion together) the eucharist would be a sign of disunity. In this situation
Mass would be inappropriate at a time when the couple wishes their symbolic,
sacramental actions to speak of unity.
WHAT SIGNS AND SYMBOLS, READINGS AND SACRAMENTS ARE
CONSISTENT, AUTHENTIC, HONEST FOR YOU AT THIS TIME AND FOR YOUR PARENTS AND
FAMILIES?
Every symbolic gesture means something: a kiss, joining
hands, exchanging rings. You want to examine the symbols you will use to be sure
that they mean what you want your wedding to mean. Not all weddings mean the
same thing; symbols appropriate for a television wedding, might not in every
case be expressive of a church wedding. If you give your bridal bouquet to the
Blessed Virgin, what do you say by this action? What does it say about your
marriage? How does it aid the prayer of those present? How does it fit the flow
of the ceremony?
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PRINCIPLE #3: THE HEART OF THE CEREMONY IS PRAYER
Your wedding day has many parts and components: The rehearsal
dinner, the reception, the photography session, the receiving line, the first
dance . . . AND THE HOUR IN CHURCH. The time in church has a different focus
than the other components. At the dinner, you want the guests to enjoy their
food; at the photography session, you want everyone to smile at the camera; at
the dance you want everyone to enjoy the music and the company. In church you
want everyone to PRAY.
AND SO: What can you do to make PRAYER the focus of the
ceremony?
How do you pray? Have you prayed together? The wedding should
not be the first time you have prayed together; the wedding should not be the
first time you have gone to church together. If you are from different parishes,
or different churches, you should participate several times in the Sunday
worship of your spouse. Afterwards, discuss what makes the service prayerful.
What helps you feel close to God? What enables the two of you to find
inspiration and strength for your struggles to follow Jesus?
You invite friends to the dinner to eat with you; you invite
friends to the dance to dance with you; you invite friends to the church to pray
with you. The prayer in church is community prayer.
COMMUNITY: You live in various "communities" --
your two families, your two neighborhoods, the people at work, the people you
have fun with. Seldom do these various groups of people (all important to you)
come together for one event. For example, the people you work with do not know
your family; your neighbors are often different from your friends.
How can you plan your wedding so that each of these various
groups or communities can be a part of the ceremony? How can your wedding speak
to each of them. Which community is the most important? When you close your eyes
and think "WEDDING" which group comes to mind first? For many couples,
it is their friends, or their parents and family.
PARISH: The focus of the "in church" part of your
wedding day is prayer. With whom do you ordinarily pray? These are the people
you should have in mind when planning the "in church" part of your
marriage celebration. Who is your prayer community? With whom to you feel most
comfortable in your dialogue with God?
These questions are harder for a bride and groom who do not
have a common parish or prayer community with which they pray. Evidently,
compromises will have to be made; consideration will have to be given to each of
your traditions of praying. It is easier planning those parts of the marriage
which pertain to only one groups of friends: the neighbors, or the bride's
friends at a shower; the groom's friends at a bachelor party. Getting all these
different groups to pray together is no easy task!
It will be extremely rare that all of the various groups or
communities of people that you invite to pray with you at your wedding will come
from the same prayer tradition. What can you do to help each person there pray?
What would hinder the prayer of your guests?
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO INVITE THE GUESTS TO MOVE BEYOND WATCHING
TO PRAYING? WHAT PRAYERS, RESPONSES, SONGS AND HYMNS CAN YOUR GUESTS PRAY
TOGETHER MEANINGFULLY?
MUSIC AND SONG: There are many beautiful songs about love and
marriage. Which of these express your faith, your prayer; which of these express
the role God has played in your relationship. Which songs and hymns invite your
guests to prayer? Do the words express the prayer sentiments of those listening
to the song? Which songs invite and encourage your guests to join in the
singing? Which songs are more appropriate for your reception than for church?
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PRINCIPLE #4: A CATHOLIC CEREMONY IS A LITURGICAL CEREMONY
A catholic wedding is a LITURGICAL ceremony. Those things
which make a good liturgy are the same elements which make a good wedding.
AND SO: Think of a time when you really enjoyed going to
church, a time when you really prayed, when you really felt close to God. How
can you plan your wedding so that it will have this same effect on your guests?
THE SUNDAY PARISH MASS: The way most Catholics experience
"liturgy" is at their parish Sunday mass. Those things which make a
good Sunday parish liturgy, will make a good wedding liturgy; and those things
which hinder liturgy in your parish, will not help your wedding. A reader who
can proclaim the Scripture with faith and understanding so as to move the
congregation to faith is just as important at your wedding as at Sunday mass.
The active participation of various ministers, the lighting, the seating,
welcoming the congregation, songs that everyone can sing: all those things that
make good liturgy make a good wedding. This is perhaps the most basic and most
neglected aspect of planning weddings!
IMAGINARY MODEL: Our imagination plays a vital role in
planning a ceremony. Everything you choose to do, you will first have imagined
in your mind. Look carefully at your mental image of the ideal wedding? What is
the basic model of wedding you have in your mind when you are planning your
wedding ceremony? What are your dreams of the perfect wedding? Or put very
simply: When you close your eyes and say "WEDDING" what do you see?
DOES THE PICTURE, THE MENTAL IMAGE, THE PERFECT WEDDING LOOK
LIKE A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING ON A TELEVISION PROGRAM? DALLAS, FALCON CREST, ALL MY
CHILDREN, GENERAL HOSPITAL? OR DOES THE PICTURE, THE MENTAL IMAGE, THE PERFECT
WEDDING LOOK LIKE SUNDAY MASS? YOU WILL BE HAPPIER WITH SUNDAY MASS!
This may be hard to believe, (for some it is impossible to
believe) but it is a fact, it is a fact that the experience of thousands of
married couples can tell you, you will be much happier with your wedding if the
"model" for your ceremony is Sunday mass than if you model your
wedding on a wedding you have seen on TV, or the marriage of a friend, or the
way you've seen it done in a park, or any other model!
It is not necessary for you to be a liturgist; that is why
you will have someone trained in liturgy -- your priest or minister -- to help
you with the details of the liturgy. But the basic principles are easy.
ACTIVE PARTICIPATION: The active participation of all present
at a liturgy is one of the key provisions of catholic liturgy. Even if it is
only the heart felt and enthusiastic "Amen" of the congregation at the
conclusion of a prayer for you, even an "Amen" moves your guests from
spectators to participants. Of course, you can go far beyond that. What draws
you into Sunday mass? Meaningful prayers? Songs everyone can sing? A smile of
welcome? Provide for this at your wedding!
WEDDING PROGRAM (PARTICIPATION AID): Just as at Sunday mass,
a worship book, hymnal, or program can provide the words for prayers which the
congregation does not know by heart, and the words to hymns which they will be
invited to sing, at a wedding many couples find that a prepared participation
aid is a help for the guests. These few pages are more than a mere program
listing the names of the wedding party and the other ministers (although that
can be important for your guests also). The words to the responses, the psalm
response, the hymns, the prayers you want them to say together -- these can all
be included in this booklet. The booklet is especially useful when you have
invited guests from various prayer communities into this one prayer. Indications
for when to sit and stand can make guests feel comfortable in your church. Many
prayers are shared by various communities: the Gloria, the Holy, holy, holy, the
Lord's Prayer. Many hymns are the shared tradition of different communities.
When you cut the cake, you want your guests to watch; when
you enter the church to ask God to bless your marriage, you want your guests to
do more than watch, you want them to actively participate, to pray, to sing, to
witness -- and at a Mass, to break the Bread of Life and share the Cup of
Salvation with you.
CONCLUSIONS: SOME THINGS TO DECIDE
Who will be in the entrance procession?
How are you going to welcome the people?
Are you going to have a unity candle?
Which prayer texts do you want the priest to use?
Which passages from Scripture express the meaning of your
marriage?
Who will proclaim the readings?
Which songs and hymns express the meaning of your wedding?
How are you going to say your vows?
What petitions do you want in the General Intercessions?
Will the wedding be at mass?
Who will bring up the gifts?
Who will assist with Communion?
Who will hold the cups for the Precious Blood?
Which blessings and prayers do you want the priest to use?
Do you wish to say a word of thanksgiving or conclusion?
Are you going to print a participation aid? What will it
contain?
I have helped hundreds of couples prepare for weddings and it
has been my constant experience, without exception, that a bride and groom that
take the time and effort to answer honestly the questions in this paper have
happier memories of their wedding than those who spend their energies only on
the reception, the dresses, the invitations, etc. to the neglect of the Church
part of their wedding day. It's your time and your money -- you can spend it
where you want. But anyone who has gone through this before you will tell you
that your time and effort are better invested in something things than in
others. Couples who have taken as much time to choose passages from the Bible as
to choose songs for the reception are more satisfied with their investment of
time when they look back on their wedding ten days after the honeymoon - or ten
years after the honeymoon. The future is always a mystery in the hands of God,
but couples who are willing to discuss together the meaning of their marriage,
their faith journey, the role God is going to play in their marriage, and the
prayer dimension of their wedding are the couples most likely to still be
together ten years after the honeymoon. It's a fact.
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[I have developed the following one page handout
that I give to couples when they first ask me to to "have their
wedding." I discuss it with them after they have watched and
discussed the video Planning
Your Wedding Liturgy]
Congratulations on Your Marriage!
Thank you for asking me to be a part of your Wedding Day!
Dear friends:
I have helped many couples plan their wedding liturgy. I have
written several books and articles resulting from this experience and I have
assisted in the production of a 30-minute Catholic Update Video: Planning
Your Wedding Liturgy which I hope will help couples such as yourselves
prepare for this most important day.
Couples make various decisions regarding the variable
elements of the liturgy. In the days, weeks, and months after the wedding, many
brides and grooms have talked to me about the things they liked best about their
ceremony. The things I hear them say most frequently are:
"Thinking of the marriage ceremony as liturgical
prayer..."
"Saying the vows by memory facing the
congregation..."
"Coming down the aisle with our parents..."
"Asking for the participation of the congregation (e.g.
in prayer and in song)..."
"Using songs that Christ would sing..."
"Saying the first words of the ceremony (e.g. Thank you
for coming... Pray for us...)..."
"Standing at the altar during the Eucharistic
Prayer..."
"Ministering Holy Communion to each another..."
"Having the wedding party enter as couples..."
"Starting with a liturgical entrance procession..."
"Being at the Church door together as bride and groom
greeting our guests as they arrived..."
"Having all the pictures taken before the wedding so
that we could go directly to the reception and be with our guests..."
These are the ritual actions that I personally prefer at
weddings – not because I like them (though I do), and not because they make
sense (which they do), but because couples who have done these things at their
weddings are most satisfied and happy that they did them. I know you may not
have thought of all of these things or may not have even seen some of them done.
But they are common in many areas and are becoming more common each day because
couples find them satisfying.
Thank you for considering these options.
Rev. Thomas Richstatter, O.F.M.
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[The following is a handout given to couples
preparing for marriage at St. Monica - St. George Parish at Cincinnati. The
parish also serves as the Newman Center for the University of Cincinnati.
I think that it is exceptionally well written with a good feel for the liturgy
and employs an excellent pastoral sensitivity. It is reprinted here with the permission of
the authors/pastors Rev. Jeffrey Scheeler O.F.M. and Rev. Alan Hirt O.F.M. I
hope it might be helpful in serving as a guide for you as you formulate your own
"handout".]
Congratulations on your engagement!! We are pleased that you will be
celebrating your wedding here at St. Monica -St. George Parish Newman Center.
You obviously have much to do in the coming months. We certainly encourage
couples to prepare for the marriage, but we know it is important to plan the
wedding ceremony, too. There are many customs and traditions surrounding
marriage and the marriage ceremony. Some of them are good and worthwhile; some,
however, should be reflected upon to see if they are appropriate for our
understanding of a Catholic sacramental marriage, and a Catholic liturgical
ceremony. We offer these reflections and suggestions so that you can think about
them as you begin to plan. We do not insist on all the specific recommendations,
we do, however, invite you to consider them seriously.
In General
Maybe it goes without saying, but we encourage you to keep the ceremony
reverent, graceful, beautiful, and appropriate. We like to encourage our couples
to keep an elegant simplicity in their wedding ceremony.
Your wedding ceremony is considered by the church to be a public liturgy, an
act of prayer and worship. There is a wedding ceremony, a wedding ritual. As
such, it is not completely private or individual, in fact, it must be a
"public" ceremony. .It should have the "feel" of prayer and
worship; something that invites people to participate. We don't want to
encourage people to simply watch as spectators.
Flowers should not be placed on the altar. In our church, you really do not
need too many flowers.
Mass, or not?
In general, if a Catholic marries someone who is not Catholic, we recommend
that the ceremony not be a Mass. The basic reason for this is that at the
present time, non-Catholics are not invited to Communion at Mass. Not having a
Mass removes the discomfort of the non Catholic party and guests not receiving
Communion.
The importance of symbols
You know how important symbols are, especially at weddings. The whole wedding
experience is filled with traditions and symbols. How we do the parts of the
wedding ceremony is important. Our rituals "speak"; they symbolize for
us what we think about what we are doing. (You might ask yourself, if someone
who had no idea of what we were doing --someone from another planet! -- came and
watched the ceremony, what would they think we believed?)
How do we come into church?
This is one of the areas where we invite you to think about something
different from what is often done now.
Most of the time you see something like this: the priest comes out from the
sanctuary, the women in the wedding party enter by themselves, perhaps meeting
their escorts at some point, and then the bride enters escorted by her father,
who "gives her away" to the groom who is standing in front.
Maybe think of it another way. The model for the entrance should be Sunday
Mass. In the entrance procession there is the Book of Readings and the
liturgical ministers: the priest, the readers, the eucharistic minister, the
wedding party.
To see or not to see?
Many times the bride and groom try not to see each other before the ceremony.
Why? In the days of arranged marriages, it was considered "bad luck"
for the groom to see the bride. Do we really want to continue or encourage such
superstitions? You might consider greeting your guests (as a couple) as they
arrive, thanking them for coming, and inviting them to pray for you. (Sure they
would be surprised, but probably pleasantly!)
The wedding party
In general, we encourage you not to have too many couples in the wedding
party, perhaps 4 or 5 at the most. The more couples you have, the more lengthy
processions become, the more crowded the space is, the more difficult everything
is to manage. For the church, all that is required is the priest/deacon and two
witnesses. In fact, the witnesses can be any two persons in attendance.
You might consider having the wedding party enter as couples, rather than
just having the women enter by themselves. This can lessen the feel of a
"fashion show" that can sometimes be communicated.
If you are using children as flowers girls and ring bearers, they should be
old enough to walk in without drawing undue attention to themselves. We suggest
a minimum age of 5 or 6.
Very often the bride is escorted in by her father. Again this developed at a
time when the bride was viewed as a piece of property given to a new owner.
While it doesn't mean that now, it may be time to evaluate the symbols. We invite you to consider having both the bride and groom enter escorted by
their parents. Sometimes there are problems with this due to deaths and
divorces, but we think it is worthwhile considering. It better symbolizes what
we Catholics believe and want to communicate to those in attendance.
As an alternative, the bride and groom could also enter together.
We do not permit the use of an aisle runner. Simply put, they are dangerous;
people can slip, especially those not in the wedding party as they go to
communion and leave the church. Again, this custom came from a time when it was
necessary to protect the dress from the dirt floor. We can save you some money
with this one!
Readings
The readings you choose should be from Sacred Scripture. You are not limited
to the ones suggested in the books we have provided you. There may be others
that speak more meaningfully to you. They should be read by people who are good
readers, comfortable with public readings. They do not have to be Catholic.
The wedding rite
In most weddings on TV, the bride and groom have their back to the crowd; the
minister faces the congregation. Here we turn that around. We invite you to face
the congregation. The priest will stand by the first pew, symbolizing that he is
witnessing your vows with the congregation.
The wedding party can join you on the steps, but they do not need to. You
could also choose to just have the maid of honor and best man join you.
It is most appropriate for you to have your vows memorized, rather than to
repeat phrases after the priest. You may think you will be nervous or forget,
but we can prompt you. People want to hear your vows to each other; it's why
they came. Often it is the only thing they can't hear! We can provide
microphones that the best man, for example, could hold near you so that the
congregation can hear you.
There is also a little phrase to say as you give rings to each other.
A unity candle?
The unity candle is not part of the marriage ceremony. It is something that
some couples have added in recent years. While it is not forbidden, we do
discourage its use. When symbols are added, there is usually a reason; often
because the other symbols are "weak" and need to be
"strengthened". It probably has been added because people could not
hear the vows and sharing of rings well. Some couples also use the unity candle
as a way of highlighting the mothers' presence at the beginning, since they
often light the two side candles. Why not do that by having the mothers enter
with the bride and groom? If you do not choose that, they could also bring up
the gifts at a Mass, or be highlighted in another way. In general, it would be
more appropriate to strengthen the primary symbols of vows and rings, rather
than adding symbol upon symbol. Adding more symbols can tend to almost
"equate" the symbols of vows, rings, candle. How do we know which is
the most important thing?
As an alternative, this might make a nice addition to the reception
festivities.
Intercessions
This is another area where you can personalize your ceremony. The books we
have given you provide you with samples. We encourage you to personalize them
for your circumstances. Again they should be read by someone who is comfortable
reading in public.
Flowers to Mary?
This devotion is also not part of the marriage rite. It too, was something
that was added, more in times past than today, but some couples still request
it. Again, we would discourage it, unless the couple has had a sincere devotion
to Mary throughout their lives. As an alternative, this could be used as a
prayerful ending to the wedding rehearsal.
Pictures, Video
Those who perform these services for you should be as unobtrusive as
possible. They should not come into the sanctuary or do anything that distracts
the prayer.
Program
A program for your guests is often quite helpful. You should let the priest
and the music director look it over before you print it, in case there are
inadvertent mistakes concerning the ceremony.
Music
You will be working with our music minister to select the music. In general,
music should be liturgical. Non-liturgical music should be used in other
settings e.g., the rehearsal dinner or at the reception.
Coordinator
At the rehearsal and at the wedding this parish requires the presence of a
church wedding coordinator. They are most helpful to the priest and the music
director. They set up the church; they help coordinate the entrance procession;
they talk with the florists, photographers, etc.
Dismissal/Receiving Line
Some couples like to return and dismiss the guests pew by pew. Some couples
also like to have a receiving line in the back of church to greet their guests.
Our experience tells us that both of these options take a very long time; they
delay your picture taking and your arrival at the reception. We would recommend
that you avoid both of these and greet your guests at the reception.
[Revised 1/01/99]
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[The following are the marriage preparation
policies for couples
preparing for marriage at St. Monica-St. George Parish Newman Center (for the
University of Cincinnati), 328 West McMillan
Street, Cincinnati, Ohio 45219. I think that they are exceptionally well written
and can be a help in composing policies for your parish. They are reprinted here with the
kind permission of
the authors Rev. Jeffrey Scheeler O.F.M. and Rev. Alan Hirt O.F.M. In
reading these policies I was struck by the fact that they cover so many (all?)
of the areas of concern.]
1. WHO CAN BE MARRIED AT ST. MONICA-ST. GEORGE?
In order to be married at St. Monica-St. George Church, either the bride or
the groom should be one of the following:
1. A registered member of our parish. A registered parishioner is considered
to be a person who has completed a parish registration form and is participating
actively in the faith life and community of our parish prior to asking to be
married here.
2. Couples seeking a parish home, who register and become participating
members.
3. One who resides within the geographical boundaries of our parish.
4. A current student who currently attends here, or a recent graduate who was
active in the parish while a student at UC.
For serious pastoral reasons, we may make an exception to these guidelines,
but only with the permission of the pastor of the Catholic parties. Catholic
parties must be registered in a Catholic Church.
2. CONFIRMING THE DATE OF YOUR WEDDING
Under most circumstances, the Archdiocese of Cincinnati requires a six-month
preparation period for all marriages.
The first step in the marriage preparation process is to speak with one of
the priests at St. Monica-St. George to discern your readiness to celebrate the
Sacrament of Marriage in the Catholic Church. Once this preliminary step has
been accomplished, a tentative date can be set. It is necessary to confirm the
date within thirty (30) days by submitting the Pre-Marital Information Sheet and
by making an initial non-refundable deposit of $50 for the use of the church. If
the date and time is not confirmed and the deposit is not received within this
time period, it is presumed that the date and/or time is not needed and your
names will be removed from our calendar.
3. WEDDING TIMES
Weddings are usually celebrated any time during the Easter Season or the
Ordinary Time of the liturgical calendar. Weddings are discouraged during the
Advent and Lenten seasons. If a wedding is scheduled during these seasons of the
Church year, the celebration must reflect the spirit of the season of the
liturgical calendar. Weddings may never be celebrated on Holy Saturday.
Weddings must be scheduled during times that will not conflict with our
weekend liturgical schedule. Our current schedule of liturgies is: The Sacrament
of Reconciliation beginning at 3:30 p.m. followed by the celebration of the
Eucharist at 4:30 p.m. Therefore, weddings are usually celebrated on Saturdays
at 11:00 a.m., 1:30 p.m. or 6:30 p.m. Given our schedule of prayer services and
weekend liturgies, Friday weddings are not possible. Although three time slots
are available, usually only two weddings are scheduled per weekend.
4. OFFICIATING PRIEST OR DEACON
The priests of our parish will gladly assist you in your marriage preparation
and officiate at your wedding as their schedules permit. At the present time,
Fr. Al Hirt is serving as the coordinator for the preparation for the Sacrament
of Matrimony. He will work with you to schedule a priest from our parish to
preside at your ceremony. He will also work with you to make certain that you
are completing other preparations that are required.
Any priest or deacon in good standing with his bishop and the Roman Catholic
Church is welcome to officiate. His name, address, and phone number must be
given to Fr. Al when the date and time of your wedding are confirmed. We will
gladly write him a welcome letter and enclose a copy of our wedding guidelines.
The officiating priest or deacon is then responsible for all preparations, the
rehearsal and ceremony as well as ensuring that all Archdiocesan and liturgical
guidelines and the State of Ohio requirements are observed. (Anyone in the State
of Ohio who witnesses marriage needs a license from the State. The priest or
deacon must present his credentials to the Secretary of State to receive a
license. It costs $ 10.) If it is difficult for the officiating priest to assist
you with these preparations for any reason, please inform us as soon as possible
so that one of the priests from our parish can assume these responsibilities.
If one of you is not Catholic, generally the wedding ceremony does not
include the celebration of the Eucharist. In that case the Liturgy of the Word
is celebrated followed by the Rite of Marriage. Interfaith couples may also invite a minister from another
denomination to take part in the celebration.
5. GENERAL PREPARATIONS
Since this is a very important time in preparing for your life commitment to
one another, the Archdiocese of Cincinnati ordinarily requires a six month
period of preparation before marriage. The steps in the preparation process are
as follows:
1. Meet with one of the priests of the parish to discern your readiness to
celebrate the Sacrament of Marriage and to determine if a church wedding is
appropriate.
2. Attendance at a "Planning Your Wedding" session scheduled by St.
Monica-St. George Parish.
3. Participation in either 1) The Pre-Cana Program or 2) The Engaged
Encounter Weekend Retreat sponsored by the Archdiocese of Cincinnati. Information about both these programs is included in this packet.
Additional
information can be obtained from: The Archdiocesan Family Life Office, 100 East
Eighth Street, Cincinnati, Ohio 45202. Phone: 421-3131. Attendance at one of
these programs should be completed significantly before the wedding, but at
least three months before your wedding.
Other preparation programs are available in other dioceses if it is more
convenient for you to attend in another geographical area. Contact the Chancery
Office of the diocese where you would like to attend for more information.
4. Completion of the FOCCUS Inventory (Facilitating Open Couple
Communication, Understanding & Study). This instrument for marriage
preparation is used in all parishes in the Archdiocese of Cincinnati. The
instrument is administered in our parish. Once the instrument has been
administered, it is computer scored. All information obtained is strictly
confidential. Once the scores have been obtained, a series of sessions with a
married couple from our parish who are trained as facilitators will assist you
in understanding the commonalties as well as the differences in your
relationships so as to draw you closer to one another. A detailed explanation of
the FOCCUS Inventory is also included in this packet. The FOCCUS should be
administered and discussed three to four months before your wedding.
5. With the guidance of the officiating priest or deacon, you will actively
participate in the liturgical preparation of your wedding ceremony. Ordinarily,
all preparations for the ceremony must be completed at least three weeks prior
to your wedding date so as not to cause undue stress and anxiety for all
involved. It is the responsibility of the engaged couple to make certain that
they have fulfilled all the required preparations. Please use the "Wedding
Checklist" included in this packet as a reminder.
6. REQUIRED DOCUMENTS
The following documents are required and must be received by our preparation
team no later than six weeks prior to your wedding.
I . The Pre-Marital Information Sheet for bride and groom. This form must be
completed when your $50 deposit is made to reserve the church.
2. Baptismal certificates for both parties whether Catholic or Protestant.
These documents must be issued from the church of your baptism no sooner than
six months prior to your wedding date. These documents help the engaged couple
discern with the priest the form of marriage rite best suited to your religious
background and personal spirituality. If you cannot obtain these documents, the
priest working with you will give you alternative instructions.
3. Responses to the "M-1" form & Addendum questions included in
this packet. We ask that these questions be completed at least three months
prior to your wedding.
4. Pre-Cana or Engaged Encounter Weekend Retreat certificate. It is best to
attend one of these programs at least three months before your wedding.
5. If non-parishioners, a letter from the pastor of each Catholic party
giving permission for the wedding to take place in our church.
6. A civil marriage license from the State of Ohio. This may be obtained
within sixty (60) days prior to your wedding from any Ohio county Probate Court.
The phone number for the Hamilton County Probate Court is 946-3589. The marriage
license must be received prior to your rehearsal. No marriage may take place
without a license!
7. FEES
[Fees are subject to change in 2002]
A $50 deposit is required to reserve the church. All other fees are due at the
rehearsal.
Registered Parishioners or Students: $50 deposit to reserve church. $100 balance due at rehearsal.
(Payable to St. Monica-St. George Parish) A registered parishioner/student is one who has completed a parish
registration form and is participating actively in the faith life and community
of our parish prior to asking to be married here.
Newly Registered: $50 deposit to reserve church. $200 balance due at rehearsal.
(Payable to St. Monica-St. George Parish)
Others: $50 deposit to reserve church. $350 balance due at rehearsal.
(Payable to St. Monica-St. George Parish.
ALL OF THE ABOVE MUST PAY: $60 fee for Parish Wedding Coordinator. (Name will be provided prior to
rehearsal.) $125 stipend for Music Director. (Payable to Jill Kreinbrink) $ 100
stipend for Cantor. (Name will be provided prior to rehearsal.) $ 100 stipend
for each additional musician. (Names will be provided prior to rehearsal.) $75
stipend suggested for Presider. (Payable to priest /presider.)
8. MUSIC & MUSICIANS
All music at St. Monica-St. George is under the supervision of our Music
Director, Ms. Jill Kreinbrink. Jill will help you plan and approve all music for
your wedding. It is important to keep in mind that the wedding ceremony is a
liturgical celebration; that is, a prayerful celebration. Music selections must
be appropriate to the liturgical setting.
It is preferred that our Music Director be the organist for your wedding.
In
the event that she is unable to play for your wedding, she can arrange for
someone else to play. The fee for our Music Director is $125. This includes
meeting with you to plan the music as well as coordinating the music and
musicians, and playing for the ceremony. This fee must be paid prior to the
wedding ceremony. Make checks payable to Jill Kreinbrink.
You will need a cantor at your wedding ceremony to lead the assembly in
singing. In the event that you decide to include other instrumentalists, our
Music Director will make contact with these professionals. Specific requests
should be made as soon as possible for either a male or female singer and other
instrumentalists. The fee for each vocalist and instrumentalist is $100.
Individual checks are necessary for each musician and singer you request for
your ceremony. It is important to note that once a musician or singer has been
contracted for your wedding, you are responsible for paying them. Checks for
musicians and singers should be given to the wedding coordinator at your
rehearsal.
It is important to keep in mind that our Music Director works with
professional musicians and vocalists that she knows are reliable and able to
perform the music you have chosen in a professional manner. The rehearsal for
vocalists and instrumentalists is one hour before the wedding. Although we
understand that wedding couples sometimes ask to have friends or family members
involved in the ceremony, we do not recommend using vocalists or
instrumentalists who are not professionally trained. If you choose to use your
own vocalists or instrumentalists who need additional rehearsal time, please
keep in mind that additional rehearsal times require a fee of $25.
The Archdiocese of Cincinnati has established guidelines for music at
weddings. A copy of these guidelines is included in this packet. Any questions
regarding music for the wedding should be directed to Jill Kreinbrink.
9. THE LITURGICAL CELEBRATION
Please remember that your wedding celebration is a time of prayer. The
spiritual dimension of the sacrament should be the first priority in planning
your wedding. The priest who will preside at your wedding will work with you to
make certain that your wedding celebration is prayerful and personal. The bride
and groom are the most important ministers of the wedding liturgy. Therefore, it
is important that you work with the Presider and music director to make
appropriate choices for songs and prayers. The book Celebrating Marriage is
included in the packet of preparation materials and contains very useful
guidelines for all couples preparing for marriage at our parish. We encourage
you to read through this book very carefully and use the worksheets to plan your
wedding liturgy. When you are finished with the book, we would appreciate if you
would return the book; it helps us keep our expenses down.
10. WEDDING COORDINATOR
We have established a position of Wedding Coordinator to assist all wedding
couples at our parish. The Wedding Coordinator works with the music director and
the priests on our pastoral staff to coordinate the plans that you have made for
your liturgical celebration. In some cases the Wedding Coordinator may
facilitate the wedding rehearsal if the presiding priest is not available. The
Wedding Coordinator will assist all visiting priests or clergy who may be
presiding at wedding ceremonies at our parish. The Wedding Coordinator will also
assist the florist, photographer, wedding party, family members and others who
will be taking part in the ceremony. The Wedding Coordinator will also serve as
a trouble-shooter in case last minute problems arise. As noted in the fee
section, the stipend for the Wedding Coordinator is $60.
11. FLOWERS & DECORATIONS
Many couples consider donating the flowers or live plants for their ceremony
to the church as a way of sharing your celebration with our entire parish
community. We always appreciate this gesture! You may, however, take any flowers
or plants with you after the ceremony if you so desire. If there is another
wedding scheduled on the same day as yours, we will gladly give you the names of
the other couple so that you may talk together so that you may consider sharing
expenses for flowers and decorations.
Sanctuary furniture, furnishings, and church decorations may not be removed
by the florist or the wedding party. You may, however, add to what is in place.
Decorations may not be set prior to two hours before the wedding ceremony. Only
masking tape or wire may be used to hold decorations in place. The parish has
many kinds and sizes of stands for plants, candles and other decorations. We do
not provide candles to be used for a Unity candle but we do have candle stands
and many sizes and styles of pedestals for displaying the Unity candle.
Because of the danger of slipping, especially for those not in the wedding
party as they go to Communion and leave the church, use of an aisle runner is
prohibited.
No flowers may be dropped in the main aisle or elsewhere in the church.
Throwing rice, confetti, bird seed, etc. is prohibited anywhere on church
property.
It is the responsibility of the wedding party, photographer and florist to
assist the Wedding Coordinator in removing all candles, decorations, and other
equipment as soon as the ceremony is over. This is most important when another
parish liturgy is scheduled later in the day. Since the florists generally do
not return to the church after the wedding ceremony, please be considerate and
help the Wedding Coordinator remove decorations.
Please keep in mind that the church is used for other liturgical events -
funerals, novenas and Masses. It is the responsibility of the wedding party to
assist the wedding coordinator clean up all flowers, decorations, programs,
papers etc.
12. PHOTOGRAPHS& VIDEOS
Photographs and videos are permitted provided they do not distract the
wedding party, the Presider, musicians, singers, or the congregation. For this
reason flash or extra lighting is not permitted during the ceremony. The liturgy
takes preference over photographs and videos. The photographer and/or
videographer may not enter the sanctuary at any time. The general rule of thumb
is that the videographer and/or photographer may not be any closer than the
second pillar from the sanctuary. We encourage all video cameras to be set on a
tripod in a stationary location. (This will also ensure that your videos will
come out smoothly).
Photographs may be taken before the ceremony or after the ceremony provided
they do not interfere with the schedule of our weekend liturgies. No wedding
parties are permitted to enter the church while other services are in session.
We ask that photographs after the ceremony be limited. The rule of thumb to
follow is that you have 90 minutes for your ceremony and photographs. This is
important to keep in mind if your wedding is scheduled before a weekend Mass for
the parish.
We encourage you to make a list with your photographer of all the photographs
you want prior to the wedding, during the ceremony, and after the ceremony. We
will do our best to help you in this process, especially after the ceremony,
because we know that you do not want to keep your guests waiting.
13. PARKING
Parking is limited in the Clifton area. Our lot is available free of charge.
It is important, however, to note that the larger portion of our parking area is
behind our Catholic Center.
If your wedding is scheduled after a parish liturgy or prayer service,
parking will be even more limited until the lots clear. All driveways must be
kept clear. Parking spaces are designated for the physically challenged.
We share with all Clifton residents and businesses the challenges of the many
hills in the area. During the winter, our parking lots tend to become slippery
slides. Please make certain that guests who may have trouble managing a lengthy
walk have someone to assist them.
14. THE REHEARSAL
We suggest that the rehearsal of your wedding be scheduled as soon as you
confirm your wedding date and time. If the celebrant will be a priest of our
parish staff, he can schedule it with you. If the celebrant is not a member of
our staff, it will be necessary to make arrangements with our parish secretary
as well as with the celebrant.
Usually rehearsals are scheduled for one hour, at 5:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. on
the eve of your wedding. It is very important that all members of the wedding
party be in attendance. We also encourage all other ministers (especially
readers) to be in attendance. It is also important that all those attending the
rehearsal be here on time. Traffic in Clifton is usually heavy on Friday
evenings so it is important to plan accordingly.
When two weddings are planned on the same day, you will be informed of the
time of the other rehearsal. A novena service is scheduled in the church every
Friday evening. Delays on your part will result in a shortened rehearsal thus
creating possible confusion on your wedding day.
Arrangements can be made for the rehearsal to take place on another day and
time if necessary. Please inform the priest if you would like to make
arrangements for another time.
Checklist of things to, bring to rehearsal:
Give to presider: Marriage License
Give to Wedding Coordinator: All Church wedding fees; Programs;
Unity Candle (if used); Celebrating Marriage book
15. THE DAY OF THE WEDDING
You may begin to decorate or take pictures in the church two hours before
your ceremony. This may not always be possible due to other weddings, funerals,
liturgies, etc. scheduled in the church. If you have a 6:30 wedding you may
arrive at 5:30 when Mass is over. The wedding party and all other ministers
during the ceremony should arrive at least 45 minutes before the ceremony is to begin.
There is a small room in the undercroft of the church where the bride and
bridesmaids can gather. Restrooms are available in this area of the church as
well. You may choose to dress in this area. If this space is used, it must be
cleaned as soon as the ceremony is over. Although this space is convenient for
the bride and bridesmaids, it is also the main restroom in the church. This can
be a problem if privacy is a must. This area is in the undercroft, accessible
only by stairs. There is also a handicapped accessible restroom in the side
vestibule of the church.
The groom and the best man usually wait in the sacristy with the priest or
deacon. Ushers begin seating guests approximately 20 minutes before the ceremony
begins. There is a restroom 'in the parish office building for use by the groom
and groomsmen.
It is virtually impossible for the bride and bridesmaids to have contact with
the Presider, the groom, and the best man before the ceremony is to begin simply
because of the distance involved. Last minute delays or problems can result in
panic! The wedding coordinator will provide assistance for the wedding party and
family members prior to the ceremony.
We do have a telephone in the sacristy but it is not equipped to handle
in-coming calls and we do not always have a receptionist in our offices on
Saturdays. If you are anticipating any situation where someone may need to
contact you, we suggest you ask a family member or friend with a cellular phone
to serve as a contact person.
16. OTHER ITEMS OF NOTE
Our Pastoral Team and the Wedding Coordinator are here to help you make your
wedding day very special. Our main priority is that your wedding will be a time
of prayer and joyful celebration for you and your guests. We will cooperate with
you to make certain that the planning process is completed with great care and
concern.
All facilities at St. Monica-St. George are smoke-free and alcohol free.
It is the responsibility of the wedding couple to make certain that you are
following the Preparation Checklist so that you will be ready for your
celebration in ample time. It is your responsibility to contact the Pastoral
Team member you are working with if problems arise or if you do not understand
what is required.
Please remember, no drinking of alcohol anywhere on church grounds!
Please remember: we are available to help you, but other parish and campus
ministry responsibilities sometimes make it impossible for us to return your
calls immediately. Please leave messages with phone numbers where we can reach
you day and evening.
We hope that you will continue to celebrate your faith throughout your
married life. You are most welcome to become involved in our parish ministries.
Ask about participating in a discussion group with other newly married
couples.
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How reasonable to you find the above guidelines?
How can you help the couple come to see the importance of the
gift (sacrament) they give to the parish?
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© Copyright: Tom Richstatter, Franciscan
Province of St. John the Baptist, Cincinnati Ohio, Order of Friars Minor. All
Rights Reserved. This page was created by Fr. Thomas
Richstatter, O.F.M. Every effort has been, and is being made, to
acknowledge sources when the ideas are not my own. Any failure to comply
with the United States Copyright Act (Title 17, United States Code) will be
corrected immediately should I become aware of it. This site was updated on
06/05/08.
Your comments on this site are welcome at webmaster2@tomrichstatter.org.
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